< Zip It Good! >

I feel so unjustified in this whole �uncle� matter. Everyone keeps telling me to shut up, to deal. Well okay I know this but damn. How come no one says ANYTHING to him??? I�m not the only one in this argument. It takes two people to start a fight. Understand jellybean? I really want to just scream and yell and hit and punch but I can�t. I�m trapped until I have enough money to get out. Until then I have to deal. To shut up. To keep my mouth shut and locked tight, zipped. I hate that things have to be that way but in reality they do. Reality bites. It�s bitten into my leg and locked it�s jaws like a pit bull, dragging and shaking me in it�s mouth. Salivaing all over me like some kind of chemical, and I can�t escape. It�s like that at home and when ever I�m anywhere but there it makes a huge ass difference that is unbelievable. Sometimes I wonder if anyone actually ever listens to me when I talk. Because everytime I try to express my feelings I�m interrupted or someone feels the need to blurt out their own similar (or in totally opposite) situation to try and relate to me. It�s really irritating. Sometimes I just want to slap them across the face and tie them to a chair and just talk. Talk, talk, talk, maybe even scream and cry. But damn. Just LISTEN to me! Really listen to me, not just hear what I have to say and then discard it after I�m done, don�t just take it in, give a suggestion and then forget we even talked. Just fucking put yourself in my shoes and then talk to me. Don�t just say, �Damn that sucks. Oh man.� Cuz it makes me want to fucking punch your lights out.

I think my uncle is hiding something in the backyard. Not only does he always go back there for some reason but he always leaves the door in the garage wide open when it�s supposed to be deadbolted. What is back there anyways? I think he�s hiding things under the house where the hole is.

We get the babies this weekend. I�m so happy about that, it�s about time I get to make some happy experiences. Those two little boogers always got something up their sleeves and they say the darndest things! I know this is random and short but I got way too many things on my mind and I gotta go! Peace!

�elena






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